Grand privilege of online grand parenting

 

It is Sunday.  The child’s parents are at home. We, the grandparents are sitting listlessly, missing our most gratifying, pleasant, and enjoyable duty, if at all it can be called a duty. Come Monday, we shall be back to our cheerful routine, spending time with our little bundle of joy, our one-year-ten-months old granddaughter, not physically but virtually.

Thanks to technology, despite staying miles away in another city, we are enjoying the company of our little darling.  Without any dislocation, sitting in the comfort of our own home, we are keeping a vigil and having fun too. When the parents -our son and daughter-in-law- leave for their office, we take over.  The baby in the care of her maid is under our supervision. It is not about keeping an eye through CCTV camera, but being in constant touch with her through video-calling, not on mobile phone but on a  television screen. Also, we have the option to connect with her on 8”x 6” electronic device that can be carried anywhere in the house.

A unique grand parenting experience it is. Whether Ariana is playing, eating or sleeping, we are virtually there with her, not just watching our sweet heart, but fully participating in her day- to- day activities. Not that we interfere all the time but there is a positive intervention as and when required. Even when she is playing with her nanny or busy with her toys, she knows we are around, of course, on her TV screen. The most joyful moments are the ones when Ariana interacts with us, telling us stories in her own language with actions and gesture. Her baby talk, not so coherent, is music to our ears.

At times, the line between the virtual and real gets blurred in our minds. We forget that our little one is not physically with us. The other day, while leisurely lounging in our room, my husband and I were watching our little darling sleeping peacefully in her cot. At the lunch time, as I picked up the device while going to the kitchen, my husband instinctively stopped me. He reacted as if I was actually carrying the baby from an air-conditioned room to the hot kitchen.

However, that was just a delusion. Virtual can never replace the real. Technology, howsoever advanced may be, can never compensate for the absence of the touch. Despite being in constant contact, we miss the child’s hugs, kisses and cuddles, for which we have to wait till we meet in person.

Video calls may not eliminate the distance but they definitely bridge it. Technology has enabled us to enjoy the grand privilege of participating in the upbringing of our granddaughter. Without any hurry and worry, we are soaking in every moment that we spend with her. Indeed, long distance grand parenting has filled our life with joyful energy.

(Published as MIDDLE in The Tribune dated 23 September 2024 )

20 Replies to “Grand privilege of online grand parenting”

  1. Another good use of technology . Very nice article dear Rama. Grand children are bundle of joys. When their virtual presence make us so happy,real company of grand children is truly a great blessings for grand parents 💗. We are here at Germany but my grand son Vidit switches to Video calls even while coming back from school. One day we had a video call from Mount Fuji by Harsh, his family from Bangalore and we sitting with our little princess at Germany. It was very delighted experience. Your brain works so well that it resonates with all your MCM family members and many more friends. It appears as if you are writing feelings of all. Keep rocking like this always 🌹💐 dear. Congratulations for your wonderful writings.

    1. Thank you so much dear Neelam. I am delighted to read your heartfelt feedback . Absolutely , grand kids are a bundle of joy, a blessing indeed.
      You and Mr Dhand are doting, extremely loving and caring grand parents . I am sure both Pulkit and Vidit are missing their dadi-dadu, now that you are with your little princess Vibha in Germany. May god bless you all.

    2. Luved reading Neelams beautiful response to your lively article Rma…
      How lucky is d phase of life having caring children.. Lil grandchildren..
      N advanced technology solacing watching kids far away n warming up ourselves vid their touches.. Keep looking them.. Forgetting aches n welcoming life in fresh n renewed form vid those whom we are blessed to live with.
      Loved your expressions. 💞

      1. Yes fi ,Neelam is one of those doting , totally devoted daadi’s who has dislocated for the sake of her grandchildren. Mr Dhand too is fully involved with the kids . These days she is with Ish in Germany looking after the new born princess .

  2. Ramadidi I actually look forward to your call saying “now you take over” Interacting with little Ariana together with Divijaa makes my day complete.Yes indeed technology is godsend!

    1. Wow ! So nice to hear from nani .😊 With Divijaa around to look after , your hands are already full . Yes , of course, you are always eager to take over online duty.
      Thanks Bhavya

  3. Rama ji
    Very well explained the complexities of modern life made somewhat made easy with technology!!
    The parents are comfortable that their bundle of joy/the grand kids are under the virtual care of their grand parents.
    Keep writing your experiences.

    1. Thanks Vibha.This is the reality . Children are in a different city , at their place of work. Thanks to technology that grand parents can enjoy and participate in upbringing of their grand kids . Believe me Vibha , it’s a blessing.

    1. Thanks Garima. I am delighted to read your comment . Being with the grandkids is like reliving and enjoying the childhood of our own children that we might have missed because of our engagements . And it’s a blessing indeed !

  4. Very pleasant write up dear Rama ! Grand parenting is one of the most satisfying job!s especially for teachers like us who have devoted our lives to mentoring students in most crucial years of their lives . I am glad you are doing it so dutifully. It is essential to keep an eye on maids and positive interventions play crucial role! Doing it physically is more interactive but it comes with huge challenges. It requires time money and energy, dislocation from own home/ country etc ! You can do it remotely being tech savvy ! once your bundle of joy joins preschool you will feel the need to be around but as you are forming a connection by virtual interaction , the baby will be accustomed to you already !
    Your crisp way of writing and relatable choice of topics leaves the reader with- YEH DIL MANGE MORE!

    1. Thank you so much dear Vini for your insightful lovely comment. Coming from an experienced, devoted daadi, the comment carries a lot of weightage .
      You are right physical presence can be challenging requiring dislocation. As against that virtual grand parenting is ‘ no pains , all the gains’.
      Thank you dear one again ,dil se . ♥️🌹

  5. I think every grandparent can relate to it and rightly said, yes! Technology has played a very important role in bridging the gap. I remember 17 years ago when my daughter had got SIA scholarship and was to settle down in Singapore just at the age of 16, we were deprived of all modern technologies and in the absence of mobile phones, had to go to STD Booth for international calling and we’re charged per minute. While talking, we’re always checking seconds, after 59 seconds, used to feel to talk little more as have already been charged for next minute! How things have changed and our generation is the last and LUCKY one, who has seen all this transformation. We are also though not monitoring, but are always excited and look forward for having a video call with our grandson , which children, because of paucity of time, want to be a brief one, but gets prolonged because you actually feel that they are physically with you. So really enjoyed your write up which I feel every grandparent can relate to.

    1. Wow! Narinder, how beautifully you have expressed the transition our generation has witnessed in telecommunications. I also remember going to STD booth to connect with my elder son when he went to America 15 years ago . And now it is very convenient, not just calls but video calls.
      We are really blessed to enjoy the company of our grandkids, though long distance.
      Thank you so much Narinder for reading and leaving your lovely comment.

  6. Dear Rama
    It us a wonderful write up.You speak for all of us.You have the gift to express simple acts in most beautiful manner.It is indeed a lovely write up.

  7. Wonderful on line grandparenting reflections…
    Whatever blessings come in life are very precious.
    You draw whole picture of bliss watching lil angel. Being vid her n interacting too…
    How fulfilled n close to heart are these blood relations..
    I am in Australia n Rabia has flooded my life vid her luv.. Kisses.. Cuddles n cries.. It’s for 1 month…
    As always your writing Rma speaks of our emotions n feelings may be in touch always online or for few days really..
    Be blessed.. 💕❣️

    1. Yes di , I am having a beautiful time .. perhaps the best phase in life . When u have your own kids you are too engaged in other things to enjoy their children. Now you have all tha time to soak in every
      moment with them .

      Glad to know that you are having a great time with your little darling Rabia .
      🤗🥰

  8. An intriguing life experience indeed! What a heartwarming article you’ve written Rama bhabhi. Ariana is blessed to have doting and tech savvy grandparents like you and Bhaiya. Thanks to technology and your flair for writing that I could enjoy reading about your experiences as grandparents.

    1. Hima, what a pleasant surprise to read your comment ! How are you ? Please do visit us .
      I am glad you enjoyed reading the piece. Our online grand parenting has nothing to do with us being tech- savvy.. it is the wonder of technology that makes video calling possible on full television screen at both the ends .Vipul gifted us the devices..settled in Australia . After Ariana’s birth ( Anshul’s daughter) , we are making the most of the devices .
      So happy to hear from u Hima . Thanks dear for connecting.♥️

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